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Is this some kind of joke, DeviantART?
Depression [Vent Art] by Agent-Pumpkin
Depression [Vent Art]
I'm going through a really rough patch right now, depression is seeping through. I know this picture isn't very good but I worked hard on it all the same - it's something that's trying to explain how I feel. I feel like I'm in something as fragile as a bubble - my mindset - and that at any moment, it could pop and leave me stranded in all the bad stuff and then I'd be well and truly fucked.

I just feel so bad, and I have no idea why... 
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She sat alone in her miserable little hide-out. It was a roof over her head, but it was still tiresome to fret over the sound of the ceiling caving in. True, a cave moulded out of dirt wasn’t the most secure place to take refuge, but for overnight it would do. Ruby was on the road, often was, and such conditions never really bothered her until the sheer dependence of her situation was brought out in the form of crumbling pillars and collapsing sticks. Such was her temporary home - and when they suffered, so did her livelihood. It was all well and good being adaptable, but even she got tired.

Suddenly, the redhead snapped alert. What once had been a bored, lazy stupor, arm leaning on her knee, hand cupping her chin as she stared into nothingness, was now a wooden-board-straight sit-up, little hands curling into very tight-looking fists, eyes narrowing to accommodate vision through the sheets of rain pouring outside.

She could have sworn she heard the tapping of something outside; the sound was much akin to footsteps, and Ruby knew that the last thing she needed - now or otherwise - was company. All she had to do was stakeout till morning, then she could move again.

Snap!

There it was again, and this time she crouched down as if to avoid being seen. It should have been impossible, impossible to see through the dreary weather and the black blanket of darkness that she had so carefully sought refuge in, but the fear was there regardless. Sharp like a knife and cold like ice running rings through her veins. The girl sucked in a breath of air and held it, the silence pounding a maddening drumbeat into her ears as she stared ahead.

Nothing.

The breath she’d been holding was slowly released. Sounds of rushing air filled her ears and for a moment she hated herself for it because the exhalation was loud. But still, nothing of interest caught her eye. There was no reason to fear, there was no reason to panic, there was no reason to---

So why hadn’t the feeling faded?

In times like these, Ruby wished that the world would recognise that such a question was not a cue for something to happen. She didn’t want surprise visits from kind strangers, or a cute little animal scurrying across the floor in search of comfort - in this case, she didn’t want a young man to come stumbling forward into her vicinity, jeans caked in mud and a face that would actually have been quite agreeable if not for the nasty marks spread across it. She didn’t want dirt to be splattered across her front as he fell face-first into the murky puddles below, and she certainly didn’t want him to look up at her and give her a charming smile despite all this.

It was moments like these that all she could do was stare.

“Ah, damn it,” the stranger groaned. It was as if pain had been slow to catch him; as if he was only just feeling the repercussions of such a slip. Either way, her eyes didn’t lighten up at the sound of a chuckle leaving his mouth. “Ah, what? I dirty your coat? Sorry.”

He didn’t sound sorry.

“What are you doing here? Who are you?”

“You ask all the right questions, don’t you?” he murmured, pushing himself up with arms that looked thin enough to be matchsticks. However, such a shove betrayed their strength, a clean sweep of his legs picking him up off of the floor with no trouble at all. “Not a ‘are you hurt?’ or a “’are you okay?’ - you’re straight down to business. I like that.”

Ruby didn’t falter, though her brow pinched a little tighter as her glare hardened. She didn’t want this man to try and smooth-talk his way into making her share. When the stranger noticed that she wasn’t going to loosen up, he sighed a sigh so tired-sounding that it almost reminded her of the weight she carried on her own shoulders.

“Nick,” he answered, after a moment of silence. “Nick Hunter.” The name was spoken as if he detested being called such a thing. She couldn’t understand why - Nick sounded okay to her. Short and to the point, believable, human. She couldn’t fault it.

The silence carried out an unpleasant tune as Ruby looked him up and down, crimson eyes staring as if they could see straight through him. Nick didn’t look impressed.

“This is normally the part that someone tells the other their name in return.”

“I’m not going to tell you.”

This time, the sigh that passed his lips was hefty, “You sure know how to make somebody feel uncomfortable, you know that?”

The young man’s expression made her waver briefly. Getting a look at him in their new-found light - brought on by an uncomfortably close proximity and both pairs of eyes adjusting to the darkness their shadows cast over one another - he was certainly something she’d avoid. Dark hair, dark eyes, and the latest addition to such a set, a dark frown. Dark everything. Like a shadow. A shadow of his former self. Given her current predicament, that didn’t seem like too much of a leap. His jeans were a little ripped, though that was probably from the fall he’d suffered as he’d staggered into her oh-so comfortable haven for the night. His jacket, black as midnight, spoke volumes where his words did not.

“What’s your name?

It wasn’t friendly this time. Much like a police officer demanding to know information - his face had said a firm goodbye to his playful expression, now he was serious. Seriousness was harder to meddle with and Ruby weakened.

“Ruby Akuma.”

“Not from around here?”

“Get out.”

A curt laugh left Nick’s mouth, lips curling up into a satisfied smirk. There was something...off about her, and yet she was so quick to jump the gun. He continued to smirk, shaking his head and raising his shoulders in a half-hearted shrug.

“Nah.”

The redhead’s face turned into one of minutes shock before falling to blankness once more. Standing up was easy, though she was shorter than him - only up to his chin in height - and it did nothing to help her case. Her eyes, sharp as daggers, met his in a dangerous clash of feeling.

“It wasn’t a request.”

The smirk only worsened and she felt her own temper flaring up, fighting against the cracks in her calculating façade. She didn’t want to fall behind this strange man, didn’t want him to feel he had any power over her. There was a lilt in his persona, a generally positive trait that anybody else would probably find somewhat empowering...but she didn’t like it one bit.

“You’d better file your complaints. I ain’t moving,” he replied, voice as smooth as silk. However, his face didn’t match the words- he was still amused, yes, that much was obvious, but it was still far too devious for her liking. She resisted the urge to stamp her foot on his, feeling her boot would go straight through if she succumbed to the urge. “What’s so bad about sharing with good ol’ Nick, eh?”

“I don’t know you for starters,” Ruby growled, daggers being thrown at him as she glared harshly. She didn’t know why she hadn’t kicked him out manually. She was sure she very well could;could beat him to his knees. But...would he fight back? He was a man, did that mean he would lash out? She couldn’t be sure, as she said, she didn’t know him. And she didn’t want to. “And I just generally find you annoying. Already. I’m not sharing with you.”

A more soft laugh left his mouth, the man rolling his eyes. His playfulness had come back in full swing and she was lost in the moment, raw emotion threatening to knock her off her feet. He was far too changeable, she couldn’t predict it.

“Relax,” Nick spoke up, finally. “I’m not going to try anything. I’ll even keep my dripping boots on the other side of this place.”

“Not happening.”

“Have a heart.”

“I’ve been constantly informed that I don’t have one.”

A scoff sounded, a large hand raising incredulously. “Hah! We both know that’s not true.”

And for the first time in quite a while, she wanted to believe it; because the sight of him dripping wet, a puddle around his feet, just made her want to let him stay. To send him out into that rain again... although something she would do, she didn’t want to. It was coming down hard now, pelting the ground mercilessly; she could only imagine how that would feel on one’s head, pounding away against their skull until it drove their thoughts in oblivion, their skin into numbness.

A long sigh was his reply. Though it was the sound of defeat, Nick wasn’t certain as to whether he liked it or not. Pride, victory and a sense of pity were all very different things, but when blurred together with such suddenness that was drawn out from one feeble sound in the dead of night, it was difficult to determine which one he truly felt.

“Just stay away from me,” Ruby finally conceded, moving back amongst the shadows, muddy coat fading into nothingness as she slid back to her previous spot and sat down once more. She should have said no, should have driven him out with her blade if she had to... she could’ve... or so she continued to tell herself.

The dark-haired man watched as she shuffled far back enough to meld with the dirt wall itself, a slight frown on his face as he wondered just who the hell he’d ended up with. She was difficult, that much he could tell already... but was it worth it? There was something she wasn’t telling him, something buried deep within her psyche that he couldn’t access through mere intimidation. Hell, with the way she refused him, especially when in such desperate need, he wouldn’t have been surprised if she was hiding several thing from him.

“All right.” And he wouldn’t be one to deny that. Nick moved his soaked body to the other end of the cave-like structure, taking himself as far into the opposite wall as possible, shedding his dripping coat and sodden boots, grimacing when his sock-clad feet touched less-than-pleasant earth, wet and grimy. It’d have to do - it’s have to, if he ever stood a chance of getting them somewhat dry overnight. “...thanks.”

Ruby didn’t reply. Nick figured she was simply being rude again. But looking over at her, she seemed to have been asleep for a couple of minutes now. She was still sat up, still perched with her knees to her chest and her head resting on them, arms locked around them and mucky coat still encasing her frame. Much like a bat, he mused with a slight smirk.

“Ruby, eh...,” he remarked quietly, lowering himself to the ground, grateful for the dry patch he had managed to salvage in his haste to get comfortable. He propped his head up with his hand, side meeting the cold floor with no protest. “...just who are you?”
...

I'm thinking of starting an ask blog for Ruby. I'm gonna keep my roleplay blog for her, obviously, but I think I'd benefit from playing around with her and putting her in different (artistic) situations based on asks. 

But obviously, before I begin, I need to see if anyone would send me asks to begin with. I have quite a few watchers on here, so I figured here's as good a place as any to ask if anybody would bother to give my blog the time of day. 

Also, if you have any questions that you'd like to be featured on the blog (I'm gonna start working on answers tonight provided I get anything and the bl;og will be made within the upcoming days), then you can on this journal entry. In fact, I urge you to - if it'll open up some choices for me, I'll be eternally grateful, haha. 

On a slightly unrelated note, I couldn't have chosen a worse time to decide to do this; just when college begins on Wednesday, haha. Fuck life, man. 
  • Mood: Thanks
  • Listening to: Mad World; Jeff Clement
  • Reading: The Shining
  • Watching: NCIS
...

I'm thinking of starting an ask blog for Ruby. I'm gonna keep my roleplay blog for her, obviously, but I think I'd benefit from playing around with her and putting her in different (artistic) situations based on asks. 

But obviously, before I begin, I need to see if anyone would send me asks to begin with. I have quite a few watchers on here, so I figured here's as good a place as any to ask if anybody would bother to give my blog the time of day. 

Also, if you have any questions that you'd like to be featured on the blog (I'm gonna start working on answers tonight provided I get anything and the bl;og will be made within the upcoming days), then you can on this journal entry. In fact, I urge you to - if it'll open up some choices for me, I'll be eternally grateful, haha. 

On a slightly unrelated note, I couldn't have chosen a worse time to decide to do this; just when college begins on Wednesday, haha. Fuck life, man. 
  • Mood: Thanks
  • Listening to: Mad World; Jeff Clement
  • Reading: The Shining
  • Watching: NCIS

deviantID

Agent-Pumpkin
Jess Danielle
Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
United Kingdom
I moved accounts; my old account was yoshi-lover, which is severely outdated. I love Don't Starve, I adore Wilson and Maxwell, and I love to write and draw cartoons. I'm planning to update a lot more on here, whether it be fanfiction or fanart. I hope you like my work, and I'll be trying my best to get my name known again. Hopefully we can all still be pals. :)
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:iconwingsunchained:
WingsUnchained Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the :+fav:!
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:iconkevin190499:
kevin190499 Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2014
Hey Agent! Happy Birthday! Are you enjoying it? ^^
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:iconagent-pumpkin:
Agent-Pumpkin Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you. 
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:iconkevin190499:
kevin190499 Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2014
You're always welcome! I'm sorry I didn't wish it earlier today! >_<
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:iconan0nym0us-care:
an0nym0us-care Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2014  New member
Dear Deviant

You're amazing, beautiful and talented in your own ways, nobody can stop you doing what you truly love. You make people happy, and they love you for that. Never change because this is who you are. You have things others don't have, so be proud and stand up. Don't let people bring you down. Don't think you are worthless, or no-one cares, because we do. We're right in front of you.

So look up, open those pretty eyes and smile. Because there's no-one else like you :) (Smile)

love ~

anonymous

(this is not a chain mail, it is a special message meant for you, it is repeated over again to over deviants because typing a new one each time would take forever, and you might not get your love from us in time :) (Smile) )

(ps. if you ever want to talk to us about something, we're here and we care, so please don't hesitate <3 )
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:iconagent-pumpkin:
Agent-Pumpkin Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I want to thank you. I really don't have much to say because I feel words kind of lose their meaning in comparison to the overwhelming sense of gratitude in my gut. But I do want you to know that I'm super grateful, as I just said. Thank you for taking time out of your day to try and convince me that things are going to be okay. It's not easy, and it will take more than that, but it would have taken even more so if you hadn't have come over and found me and sent me this message.

I'll read it when I need a good reminder too. Thank you ever so much.
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:iconan0nym0us-care:
an0nym0us-care Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2014  New member
No problem <3
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:iconmagnnezium:
Magnnezium Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2014
I know I probably said this before, but your picture is epic. XD
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:iconagent-pumpkin:
Agent-Pumpkin Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Which one?
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:iconmagnnezium:
Magnnezium Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2014
The one on your deviant ID panel.
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